Finding Your Relationship Style w/Dr. Anita Kuhnley
It's hard to capture our attachment styles in just one word and yet humans describe ourselves as securely attached, anxiously attached, disorganized, or avoidant, as well as a combo of these styles.
We don't put them on dating sites, of course, but we read the books, and then we sit with it. And then what?
That's the problem. These labels alone, which can feel condemning, don't give enough direction or wholeness to who we are or who we are becoming, and of course there are reasons why we've landed in any one or more of these attachment camps, too.
To date, it's been a long time when a researcher and writer could take us on a relationship style journey with these styles and teach us ways to grow as well as to just appreciate who we already are.
This, my friend, is why I LOVE this rich and creative conversation with Dr. Anita Kuhnley on the pod! Anita has allowed us to see the role each of these attachment styles plays in protecting and surviving and yes, loving too. (She even gives them practical vocational names, such as firefighter, investigator, etc.)
She also walks us through a healing attachment exercise (she does it with us right on the pod!) and brings you a reminder of hope - yes, you can build love again even if you didn't get all the best attachment as a kid for whatever reason.
Why I am especially honored she spent time with us is that Dr. Kuhnley is knee-deep in attachment research and comes with high recommendation from Dr. Gary Chapman, Dr. Daniel Amen, among other researchers and creative innovators in their own right when it comes to personality and social science.
Not only is Dr. Kuhnley a trainer of psychologists at Liberty U and Regent U but she's also an attachment scales decoder and a fellow author at Baker Books, in addition to so many other credentials below.
Listen on Apple or Spotify here! Watch on YouTube here!
Find more ways to connect with your spouse in our 5 week relationship course or in our book, “Enneagram in Marriage.”
