Deepening Intimacy in Marriage through Prayer

As I literally just finished praying over our breakfast with my spouse before writing to you this Christmas Eve morning (and while he runs out for gingerbread pancake ingredients for our kids!), I'm grateful to cozy up with you for a moment to share the topic of prayer in marriage on this show!

Is prayer measurable statistically? Yes, our convo goes right along with the research from University of Georgia and The Institute for Family Studies that allow us to see that prayer together really does influence marriage in a positive direction (whether it be “softened-start up” prayers, "fire extinguisher in-the-moment prayers, or cleaning up wounds later with "band-aid" prayers,)

So yes, prayer, as long as it is not weaponized, is statistically helpful…

And on this pod, we do talk about weaponizing, too, because this is not my first rodeo with couples who often need reminders about pushing one's own desires onto a spouse who may feel religious wounds or manipulated.

To cover this important terrain we have a very special guest too, as we welcome marriage pastor and author Scott Kedersha right here with us onto the podcast with us! If you notice, it's a day early since tomorrow I know many of us will be celebrating.

Why I think Scott's tip offer us a great listen: What I'm most excited about is not just hearing about Scott's experience with working with couples across 17 years, although I love that too, but about how he has a posture of examining himself in prayer too and largely trusting his wife's growth to God, versus trying to fix, control, or change her without doing his own work.

More, the prayer life he has found with his his wife has deepened their intimate bond.

Finally, Scott, a fellow Baker Books author (and his book literally sold out the first day on Amazon!) lets us probe for hard questions without feeling judged yet he is centered and practical as an Enneagram 3, and he also shares here and on a recent Instagram live he did with me about his own scars and wounds.

Some of the tough questions I asked today are:

What do you do if prayer feels awkward, overly emotional, or canned? 

What if it feels manipulative? 

(Asking for a friend in both directions at times, lol!)

Scott does a great job of sharing stories of change, faith, and closeness this holiday and I hope you'll share them with us right here when you get a chance this week! Listen on Apple or Spotify here!

Find more ways to connect with your spouse in our 5 week relationship course or in our book, “Enneagram in Marriage.”